Podcast #3
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[00:00:00] We are all raising children today in an uncharted world. We can't really compare what our parents did or what their parents did because the world is such a different place now than it was back then. There are obviously. Universal truths. No matter what the world looks like, that children need to feel love from the adults closest to them.
They need to be kept safe. They need to know they will be loved and safe, not just today, but always. They need to experience peace and joy in their lives. They need to feel those things in the lives of the people around them. They need to feel seen. They need to feel enjoyed by those closest to them and know that they delight us.
Right? We all know what it's like. Hopefully to have felt that with one of our parents or another adult in our lives as kids, that they lit up when we came into the room, that we had a clear feeling that they really liked us and [00:01:00] they enjoyed being with us and spending time with us. We of course, need to take those universal truths about what kids need and combine that with the really good stuff we may have picked up from our own childhood and continue that with our own children.
But more than anything, we need to realize that no one has the recipe for growing healthy children in this era because so much of our everyday lives is truthfully a test project of something we haven't tried before. And we have no idea whether it promotes healthy development. It is more important than it has ever been before as a parent to cultivate both your critical thinking skills and your intuition, or your connection to your own ability to hear that.
The gut feeling that we were all born with, that tells us what's true for us and what's not. We need to sharpen our skills. [00:02:00] To be able to hear that, and luckily, those things are skills that we can learn and we can sharpen along the way and the next step after being able to think critically about things that become a part of our kids' lives and create a strong connection to our intuition about whether those things are healthy and right at this time for our child's development, we then need to get really good at being a vocal advocate for those things for our children.
Which can mean going against the grain of what everybody else is doing, and that is not always easy. In fact, it's often so hard that we end up abandoning what we know is right for our families deep down. And we can sometimes regret tho those choices later on. And when so much of our everyday lives is now dictated by.
New technology, new ideas, new systems. [00:03:00] It's so important to remember that not every good idea that someone comes up with for our kids is taking that unique child and their whole entire wellbeing and life into account. I have a clear example of this with my own two children that I'm raising in Norway, where they were born and where we live.
When my son, who is now 13 and in eighth grade, started in first grade at six years of age, the area that we live in was one of the first school districts to integrate more digital learning, as they call it, and began using many more digital tools and gave every kid all the way down to the first grade their own Chromebook, which for those who don't know, is a combination of like a laptop and an iPad.
So every kid had access to their own Chromebook, and then several subjects no longer had textbooks or printed materials. [00:04:00] The material for the class would now be digital, not for all of their subjects, at least not at my son's school, but for at least half. And this started here in 2017 when my son was six.
And in this country, those things were new, at least in elementary or primary schools for children this young. And no one knew if it was actually a good idea to take away books and make learning digital. It was a test project on our kids wrapped up and presented to parents as something new and technologically advanced that would help our kids be even more prepared for and competent in the digital future that awaits them.
We as parents didn't get asked if we wanted our 6-year-old to have a Chromebook. We didn't get the option of textbooks or a [00:05:00] Chromebook. We got told that this was happening and presented with a multi-page contract that we were financially responsible for this Chromebook if anything happened to it, and it was off to the races for our first graders.
So last year a report came out of the Norwegian government about how it's been going since then. They've obviously been studying this as it was introduced, and in these initial years of making such a big change to the education plan for primary school kids to see the effects of these changes on learning.
It has obviously been widely discussed here with many people having an opinion that digital learning for all kids, but also for kids this young was introduced without much knowledge on whether or not kids are able to learn as well, digitally as they do with printed materials and paper and a pencil.[00:06:00]
There were also a lot of concerns about whether kids would be. It protected enough from everything that is on the internet, which is really essential when schools decide to give a 6-year-old internet access. And of course, on the opposite end of the spectrum, because of this early digitalization, Norway was a country whose education system was less affected by the pandemic lockdowns and restrictions over that three year period because.
All the pieces were already in place for online learning, even for the youngest students and researchers have been critical that the government and school districts have had too optimistic of a view on digital technology, giving kids more future opportunities, but too little focus on whether or not actual learning of the basics can be done as well digitally.
As it's [00:07:00] been done with printed materials, and again, as parents, there was no opting out of being a part of this test project for our kids. So at this point last year, in 2024 here, 85% of first through fourth graders in Norway have their own Chromebook or iPad or laptop provided by the school, and 98% of fifth to 10th graders have their own.
So, how is this going for us? The research so far shows that parents in general are more negative to the use of screens now than they were before. The plan for increased digital learning started, especially for the youngest children, they were especially concerned about their kids. Uh, not developing adequate skills in reading and writing and math and that many of the digital tools that were used for these subjects were almost more distracting to kids [00:08:00] and, and their ability to focus than they were helpful.
And they also felt like it has become much harder to help kids with homework and support their children generally with schoolwork when so much of the material and homework is digital. Studies out of Denmark and the Netherlands and Finland show negative effects on the amount of time kids spend in front of screens and their brains developing optimally when it comes to concentration and executive function.
And other studies report kids themselves saying that they have a harder time learning and concentrating when they're using digital technology. And the results also show that for young kids the combination of text, pictures, videos, and sound can quickly overstimulate children's cognitive resources. It's too much.
In other words, another effect has been an increase in nearsightedness [00:09:00] because we aren't switching between looking at things close up and looking at things far away throughout the day like we used to. And headaches and musculoskeletal symptoms that I am sure kids have had for as long as they've been forced to sit in chairs during the day instead of running around like kids should be doing.
Haven't gotten any better as a result of looking more at these screens. Reading skills have decreased significantly over the entire world, but also here in Norway and results. Show really clearly that to be good readers, kids need to be reading longer texts, which is much harder to do on a screen where the text just kind of seems to run on and on instead of being split up into pages that need to be turned.
It's also a lot harder to process and really understand the material that we're reading when reading digitally as opposed to from a book. And I think all of us as adults intuitively feel the same way. We may [00:10:00] be. Able to force ourselves to concentrate and understand what we're reading. But it's much easier when we're turning pages and able to more spatially remember where certain things were written on a page than it is without those cues.
Test scores for writing have also been poor. With more integration of digital tools and math skills have also gone down with more integration of digitalization. And if this and the pandemic showed us anything, it's that our children just don't seem to be doing as well currently as they have done previously.
And that really was the ultimate test project on our kids, wasn't it? Locking our kids up at home in the name of keeping the grandmother alive. The ultimate test project that again, no parent was asked whether they wanted to participate in just forced to comply and then deal with the consequences on their children's health and development alone [00:11:00] after the fact.
And you'll notice that nobody who pushed for those rules is showing up after the fact to help with the consequences. Right? Just like with all the parents, with kids who are really struggling with reading and writing and developing the skill of focus and concentration to do well in school, who are left completely alone, to figure out what to do now to help their kids get back on the right track.
And so what's the point? The point is that we as parents need to develop razor sharp, critical thinking and deep intuition. When it comes to decisions that are made for our kids in areas that affect their physical health, their mental health, their education and development, socialization skills, anything that affects their health and their wellbeing.
Nobody who comes up with recommendations or systems or programs can look at the effects of those on your specific child's health and their your child's wellbeing [00:12:00] the way you can yourself. Mothers in particular have an almost supernatural intuition about their children's needs. But so much of what happens in society is about making mothers feel like they don't know as much as someone with a degree or something that gives them fancy letters behind their name.
I have some letters behind my name and I will tell you that I have by far learned the most about children's health from the lived experiences of the mothers in my practice for the last 22 years. And mothers need to remember that enlisting the help of someone who maybe has some fancy letters can be really smart and helpful when there is an issue with your child's health or development.
But at the end of the day, you alone can feel what feels right for your children and for your family. And by the way, it's okay if what felt right a year ago doesn't feel right anymore. It's okay. And it's intelligent, even to change direction. If something that was working is [00:13:00] no longer working. That's called clinical experience, and those of us with the letters do it all the time.
When we know better and we know more, we do better. And even though there is a general path that all human beings need to stay close to, to promote health in the human species, there isn't a one size fits all solution to health and development. Each child is their own unique brain and nervous system developing in their own unique environment.
And we need to take that into account always when we're looking to create thriving families. I look forward to the next time, and until then be well. I.
